I had been laboring over the writing of a blog post, trying to get my point across and was not very happy with the result. If only I could find the right words and place them in the right configuration I would be heard, and the truth would be recognized!
I struggled, even though I was well aware that no matter how logical or persuasive one’s arguments may be, they do not have the ability to change the beliefs of another, they are just more words being thrown about.
We only change our beliefs and the structures they uphold when we encounter an experience outside of our normal frame of reference that cannot be explained away no matter how much we try to cling to that which is being shattered.
I knew from experience that I should stop writing and do something completely different to give my operating systems a chance to reboot. I decided to be bold and take a breather with some acid.
I had taken that piece of dried mango laced with LSD across the Atlantic and back and still had not felt that I had the right time and frame of mind to indulge in the hope of a consciousness expanding experience.
In my prior experimental forays I never seemed to attain the experience that I sought. I reasoned whether I could endure 24 hours with every cell in my body racing like a Lamborghini on the Autobahn for another disappointing experience of poor quality LSD.
Today I felt compelled to give it a go. We were within the auspices of the full moon, Mercury was just stationed direct out of retrograde, and it was Sunday, yeah, no schedules, certainly an opportune time.
So I munched with determination on that piece of dried mango and waited. I was not alone, however, and the hours went by while we frolicked. After some time hunger overtook my companion and off he went for Chinese take out. I finally had a moment of quiet contemplation.
I reclined on the couch and gently gazed at my arm. It seemed immense and heavy as stone. I could not lift it. I felt myself to be in a vast structure, a holy place that contained me. I did not feel trapped, only amazed at the solidity of it all. I felt serene and noble like the great Sphinx of Egypt.
The moment passed but the experience registered. This was the mystery of the Sphinx, the miracle of spirit descended into the density of matter. We have all heard the cliché “the body is a temple for spirit” but who has really had the experience of that knowing.
Until we open to the experiential reality of life in all of its gut wrenching, awe-full-ness, and its raw, immense beauty arguments are all just words being bandied about, ” full of sound and fury, signifying nothing” but still I have to get back to those words, words, words.
Quotation from Shakespeare’s- Macbeth